Is this how it happens? Does abundance come after there’s a breaking of some sort? Then there’s a blessing?
I’ve been broken plenty of times.
In my large family-of-origin, we knew alcoholism, abandonment, losses, hunger, hurting, cancer. I know brokenness.
But somehow…goodness and abundance came out of it. How does that work?
To my logical mind, it never made any sense. How could the opposite come from hunger or alcoholism? I have no answers. I only have my story.
I lived it out, so I believe it.
In The Silver Chair by C. S. Lewis, Aslan says, “Remember, remember, remember the signs….”
I’m still trying to connect the dots and recognize the signs.
I saw my friend in Wal-Mart yesterday. She showed me where a cancer had been removed from her arm, just that morning. Instantly, I remembered the feelings that went with my own cancer story. Those are the feelings that met her eyes. It was like tasting brokenness again. After parting, I prayed for her and felt close to the heart of Jesus all day.
Where might I be headed after Walmart? To my oncology doctor’s, of course! Oh, the timing of our connection.
I’ve been cancer-free 8½ years, but I have check-ups every six months. I wasn’t consciously stressed about it, but I knew any kind of news could come my way within the next hour.
As it turned out, I received good news (abundance), but now I’m struck by how connected we are, how our moments are connected to the past and to others.
Is this for real?
Well, I glance back over the last month.
I finally received publication rights to Blind Curves, and we found a loving home for our goats! Hallelujah! They were eating my flowers and shrubs!
People are handing us veggies, chickens, eggs. Friends and neighbors.
As if that were not enough, my husband managed to unstick my computer key. Frustrating for weeks. And I now have a cell phone that reaches beyond our valley! If I need it, I’ve got it. There’s more, but you get the idea.
Is this real? All of it together seems pretty unreal to me.
I don’t have a roadmap. Just trying to connect dots and road signs.
What happened before each gift of abundance? Some sort of suffering. That’s right—the check-up, the book, a good home for the goats, fresh produce, laptop, a phone. Before each one, minor struggles.
My point is that the goodness and dancing followed some suffering. Every time.
I stand with C.S. Lewis's message. I know I need to remember, remember, remember the people I have put in my heart. Clocks and time, valleys and mountains can’t separate us from those wonderful people. We can relive and remember sweet times which include them.
And then there’s Jesus, saying, “This do in remembrance of me.” (Luke 22:19 KJV)
Jesus would not have said this if He had not wanted to be remembered. It was a command preceding the Lord's Supper.
Do I always remember Him? No, not when I'm picking up limbs in the yard or pulling clothes from the dryer. I'm often caught sleep-walking.
All I know to do is to ask Jesus to help me remember Him and what’s important. So I ask Him to help me remember. Remembering may be the roadmap.
It’s the best I know to do.
P.S. Thank you for Comments and Shares.
Photo: A pretty sky-day to remember, remember, remember. September 12, 2019.